By MELODY WAUKE – Guest Writer
Applying to college is a dull and tedious process, especially writing the many required supplementary essays.
The University of Chicago, luckily, takes a more interesting approach to these essay prompts. The college provides six possible topics, each of which being surprisingly thought-provoking and fun. The prompt I chose was “So where is Waldo, really?”
I approached this unconventional prompt in the only fitting way: unconventionally. Instead of writing it in standard essay form, I answered the prompt in a collection of journal entries, made by Waldo himself. In writing this “essay,” I discovered that not everything about applying to college needs to be mind-numbing and irritating.
Finding Myself: The Memoirs of Waldo
The following are Waldo’s personal journal entries, beginning in 1987.
March 4, 1987
Some days, I feel like I can’t handle reality anymore. Wilma left me, and this time, I’m pretty sure it’s really over. I’ve seen it coming for a while, though, and honestly, I don’t blame her. She said I was just too much. “Eccentric,” I believe, is the word she used. “Always the center of attention.” I don’t mean to be. At least, I don’t think I do. How can I possibly help it that I stand out so much?
I think I’m just going to leave it all behind. There’s nothing here for me now, anyway. I guess I can use this as a chance to “find myself,” or whatever it is people do.
April 18, 1987
So, I did it. I packed my bag and left with the clothes on my back: that striped shirt and matching hat Wilma gave to me for my birthday and some blue jeans. I’ve saved up enough money over the years, so now I’m free to do whatever I want. I’ve been thinking a lot about what Wilma said about me always being the center of attention. Maybe I do need to learn how to tone things down. Blend. Be a wallflower, for once.
So, for the past month or so, I’ve just been people watching. I travel to wherever seems interesting or exciting and do my best to simply observe. I guess I’d really underestimated how much you can gain from simply soaking in your surroundings.
October 9, 1987
When I left, I didn’t tell anyone where I was going or what I was planning to do. I didn’t think the whole thing through very well, to be honest. It was a pretty spur-of-the-moment decision. So, technically speaking, I’m a missing person. I know, I should probably contact home and let them know that I haven’t been gruesomely murdered or abducted. But, at the same time, it’s kind of exhilarating. I didn’t expect people to care enough to even notice I was gone. There are people out there who are actually trying to find me, who are worried about me, who care. When I left, I didn’t think anyone cared at all. That’s what heartbreak can do to you, I guess.
June 15, 1993
I can’t believe it’s been six years since this all started. I suppose I should recap what’s transpired since my last entry.
In short, my conscience got the best of me. I didn’t want people to be legitimately worried that I had been murdered, but I also didn’t want to have to go back to my old life. I still don’t. So, I figured out a way to let them know that I’m not dead: postcards.
Basically, I just travel wherever I want, then set up a camera to take a picture of me in the middle of a busy area. I’d like to think I’ve gotten reasonably good at blending in with my surroundings, having picked up the art of camouflage from all my years of observing. Anyway, I’ve been taking these pictures and sending them back home. It’s a sort of game to me. I don’t know if it frustrates or fascinates people back home, or if anyone even cares anymore. It’d be nice to know that Wilma still anticipates my postcards, but that’s just wishful thinking. For all I know, she’s moved on, married, had kids.
July 22, 2012
My hobby has gathered quite a bit of attention over the years. The news sources have titled my little game “Where’s Waldo,” which I think is a bit cheesy, honestly. I’ve actually been recognized a few times, which, ironically, is the exact opposite of what I wanted from this whole plan. But that hasn’t stopped me from enjoying my adventures.
I’ve been all around in these past 25 years. I never stay in one place longer than a month. Currently, I’m in Canada, pondering my next move. I still think about Wilma, but not bitterly. I’m content. I’ve proved her wrong, because it’s obvious now that I do know how to not stand out. I’m doing what makes me happy, and that’s all that really matters, anyway. In a way, I guess I did “find myself,” simply by making sure that no one else could find me.
-Waldo
